See, I can’t wait to be thin again and feel comfortable on my own skin. I wanna hang out with my friends and enjoy my life. To me, gaining weight is a terrible thing, because every time that I got fat, I isolate myself from the world, don’t go out and don’t even talk to my friends (over the phone or internet). I feel like they could find out that I got fat again, that I’m a pathetic girl that can’t even control herself, that says that doesn't eat, that food doesn't control her and then start to eat like a pig.
If it wasn’t for the pills, today I wouldn’t be capable of losing weight. Since I’ve become a compulsive eater I can’t eat like a normal person. Now I live of amphetamines and anti-anxiety medications plus my meds for the agoraphobia. I used to be a pretty outgoing girl but the ED has changed my life and only brought sadness and more diseases and phobias along.
Complaining does not help, so I have to get my butt out of the couch and start doing something about it, am I right? I sincerely hope that you guys feel the same way I do.
Because we are too good to be defeated by food.
"All the best people have bad chests and bone diseases. It's all frightfully romantic."
5 comentários:
Hi dollface. I am so sorry, I am such a ditz, can I have your email again? I got bored of that Twitter, and so I deleted it before I remember to get your email address..
And even if your week wasn't perfect, as long as it is improving from the last week, it is a good thing. :) I don't think with our mind frames we can ever reach 'perfect'.. it feels so far away. But all we can do is improve, and sometimes that is enough. :)
I tend to isolate myself too when I gain weight, out of shame or embarrassment. Which leads to hateful binging, and even more weight gain, until it's this vicious circle that's nearly impossible to get out of. But it sounds like you've been doing really good, so don't worry, it'll come off before too long. :)
Oh wow, I know absolutely zero words in portuguese xD... it was fun getting the translation from something like translator.com though. But how bout we stick to english like you said just to make things a tiny bit easier xD
anyway, I wanna try these ansiolíticos things you talked about, but I`m having kind of a dilema: "do I ask my parents or do I go straight to it?" After a long time of meditating... I think I`ll go for the second one :) (desperate times call for desperate measures)
And about the diet... awful, I cannot even begin to explain (like five bags of cookies DAILY, not kidding, and much more unnecesary food).
So yeah I wanna try elminating my anxiety, and tomorrow`s a new day right? :)
"To me, gaining weight is a terrible thing, because every time that I got fat, I isolate myself from the world, don’t go out and don’t even talk to my friends..."
I know exactly how that feels, it`s been like that for two weeks straight already, maybe more.
Thanks for the advises and opinions, it`s liberating to have someone to talk to and help you out.
I sincerily hope things get better for you :)
And like you said... "Because we are too good to be defeated by food."
(k)
Oh yay, msn... gotcha.
Thanks for the comments, they help A LOT, always.
hope we can talk soon!! :)
(k)
hello!
Hey thanks for the comment on my blog. my e-mail is dreams2bdesired@gmail.com if you wanna be friends.
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